December 19th
by beautifulpurpleflame
Summary: My Secret Santa present to Kasumychan on tumblr. BBxRae


**December 19****th**

The side glances. The intentional brushing of skin as they passed each other. The odd out of place word quietly said aside, soft and smoldering. The heat that rose in her chest whenever their eyes caught for just the briefest of moments. This was her day to day life. And she knew, through her empathic abilities, it mirrored his. She couldn't pinpoint when it all began, the silent attraction between them. It wasn't instantaneous like a bolt of lightning. It was gradual like sand in an hourglass; small insignificant moments slowly piling up into something more, something incredible. She both loved and feared any moment they had alone together.

She sat in the common room with a novel between her hands, though she couldn't concentrate on it for the life of her. He was doing something in the kitchen. She didn't dare turn around to see what it was but she guessed he was getting himself something to eat. Every so often she could feel his eyes gaze upon the back of her head. And her hair stood on end. She closed her eyes and basked in the feeling of his emotions as his attention focused on her for the slightest of moments. And when it passed she felt as though the temperature in the room had dropped. She shivered.

"Raven, which do you think is the more beautiful dress?" asked Starfire.

"Huh?" she jumped. The empath hadn't even realized the alien had been sitting on the couch next to her. She looked and saw that there were stacks of magazines everywhere and a pile of pulled out pages with dresses on them. This was nothing odd, though. One of the hobbies Starfire enjoyed was scrapbooking clothing she admired. "Oh. They both look the same to me."

"Oh no! They are very different," Starfire explained. "You see, this dress has the embroidery around the collar and-"

"Sorry, Kori, but I'm really not interested," Raven said quickly and stood up, closing her book. She looked around the room and saw that not only was Starfire present but Nightwing and Cyborg were as well. The two were playing videogames and were even sitting on the couch not too far from where she had been sitting. She felt inwardly embarrassed that she hadn't even noticed them due to her focusing so much attention on _his_ presence.

"But you must choose a-" Starfire attempted again.

"No thank you," Raven cut her off. She headed for the door and put up her hood, deliberately avoiding looking into the kitchen. She could feel him watch her leave and it warmed her once again. She wanted to turn and meet his gaze but couldn't; she didn't want to be that obvious. She didn't want him to know that she was always aware when his eyes fell on her.

Out in the hall she managed to catch her breath and took a moment to compose herself. She wasn't sure how much longer this could go on. It would surely come to a head soon. It wouldn't be long before the others noticed and then what would they do? She didn't want anyone to know. Or rather, she didn't want anyone else involved. This odd game they were playing was intimate. And that made it all the more alluring for her.

She made her way towards her room, planning to meditate for a while then try to read her book again. But as she approached the first corner she came to a complete halt. She felt him. He was closing in on her. He was there.

"Well that wasn't a good idea," he said.

She coolly turned around and said, "What wasn't?"

"Kori was trying to get you to choose a dress for the Christmas Eve Benefit Gala," he explained. "You realize that if you don't get back in there she's gonna order your dress for you. Didn't you learn your lesson last year?"

She groaned. "_That_ was why she was shoving a magazine in my face? Damn, I forgot it was December." The Titans Christmas Eve Benefit Gala was an annual event where the cream of society attended to raise money for three different charities, which changed every year.

"Well unless you wanna look like a raspberry pastry you better get your ass back there and choose something," he advised.

"Fine," she sighed and turned around. "Did you chase after me just to tell me that?"

"Well of course," he said casually. "You think I wanna show up in front of the press with a dessert on my arm?"

"Well there's no worry about that, seeing as I won't be on your arm," she said without missing a beat and walking ahead of him. She wasn't about to let him know that what he'd said had startled her for a moment. Had he just asked her to be his date? Or was he just joking around? At this point she could no longer be sure what his intentions were.

"So whose arm are you gonna be on then?" he asked, following after her.

"No one's. I don't need any arm to be on," she replied.

"Oh come on, _everyone_ goes with a date," he rolled his eyes.

"Then who are you going with?" she asked, doing her best to seem as uninterested in the answer as possible.

"Well I don't know now that you've left me high and dry," he pretended to huff.

"Are you surprised?" she asked. "Had you actually asked me and not just assumed I'd be desperate enough to go with you I might have actually entertained the idea."

"I just figured we were both desperate and you wouldn't argue," he shrugged. "Showing up alone is only asking for trouble. Might I remind you of the first benefit?"

"Please don't bring that up," she shivered. She'd opted to go alone to the very first benefit gala and had become the poster girl for single women. She was bombarded with magazines and shows wanting interviews and trying to set her up with other singles. She had certainly learned her lesson. "I guess it would be best to go with someone. I wonder who'll be free to escort me this year. Isn't Wally on a break from Jen?"

"_Wally_? You'd take him over me?" he exclaimed.

"If he were to ask me properly and not just assume I've got no one else, then yes," she said. They walked back into the common room and she quickly went over to Starfire who was still sitting on the couch looking through magazines for dresses. She grabbed the ones the alien wasn't thumbing through with her powers and held them out before her. She flicked her hand and began to look through seven simultaneously. After about nine flips she grabbed one magazine and moved the rest back to the coffee table. She ripped out a page and handed it to her friend. "This one."

"Oh a lovely choice!" Starfire smiled. "Perhaps you would like me to order it in red or-"

"Blue," Raven said quickly and firmly. "Dark blue."

"But that is not a very festive color," said Starfire. "A winter holiday themed party should consist of colors including red or green or white or-"

"Dark blue," Raven repeated firmly.

"Alright, if that is what you desire," Starfire sighed. "May I choose your shoes and accessories?"

"Knock yourself out," said Raven and headed out again. Oddly, the changeling had followed her back out of the room. She pretended not to notice or care.

"So where are you going?" he asked.

"Where are _you_ going?" she countered.

"Gotta take a leak," he shrugged. "You?"

"Just going to meditate for a bit," she replied. "I've got a bit of a headache, especially after hearing that the benefit gala is soon."

"Yeah, I figured something was up cuz I saw you having trouble reading earlier," he said.

"Excuse me?" she replied, her nerves immediately jumping. Had he noticed that she had been aware of him when he was in the kitchen?

"Well you were stuck on the same page for like ten minutes," he chuckled. "I thought maybe you were distracted by something."

She blushed and blessed the luck of her hood. "If I was it was just the presence of four other adults in close proximity to myself. It can be very distracting."

"Yeah, I hear ya," he agreed, stretching up and holding the back of his head casually. She swore he was doing it to show himself off. She felt like telling him there was no need and that she had memorized the look his body many times at every possible chance she had. She wasn't proud of it, but it was the truth. He stared straight ahead and said, "Kinda makes you wish we could have some alone time, you know?"

She nearly tripped over her own foot. "What do you mean?" she asked as flatly as possible, refusing to showcase her racing heart.

"Well, you know, time to just be in the common room alone to do what you want without having to wait or be considerate or anything," he explained, putting his hands down into his pockets. "Or… just be in there with someone who you know won't bother you or anything. Someone you get along with and don't mind being alone with."

"Yes, that would be nice," she said, remaining outwardly indifferent. She then noticed he'd missed his exit that would bring him to the bathroom. She decided to bite her tongue for a few feet, which were walked in silence. Finally she said, "Don't you have to go to the bathroom?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah!" he said with an embarrassed grin and turned around. "See ya."

She didn't bid him a farewell for she knew he wanted her to and she wouldn't give him that satisfaction. As the saying goes, leave them wanting more. And she wanted him to want more. A lot more. She smiled deviously beneath her hood and continued walking.

"Uh, Raven?" he called after her.

She looked over her shoulder. "Yes?"

"Um… never mind," he said and went to go into the bathroom but backed out a moment later. "Well actually, do you… um… forget it." In. Out. "How long are you gonna meditate for?"

"For as long as I desire," she shrugged.

"Ah. Okay then so… well… later." And with that he finally went into the bathroom.

She was quite amused by that odd moment between them and went to her room chuckling silently to herself, though thoroughly perplexed. It was the first time in a long while she'd seen him so… jumpy.

She meditated for a solid hour and felt quite refreshed by the end of it. She no longer let thoughts of the benefit trouble her mind and she basked in the memories of her short interactions with _him_. But they were bittersweet recollections. She wished he'd have a little more sense. Did he think he could just assume she'd go to the benefit with him without even asking her? She might have been desperate but she had standards, one being that she could never go anywhere with anyone that didn't properly ask her. But she supposed that if he had asked her, even with the farce about them both being desperate to cover the fact that they'd be each other's dates, she'd have been so flustered she might have refused him.

Just as she stood up to grab her book there came a knock on her door. She walked over and slid it aside to see the changeling of her thoughts standing before her. She masked her surprise and said, "Yes?"

"Hey, you busy?" he asked.

"Not particularly," she replied.

"I just didn't wanna interrupt you if you were in the middle of your meditation or anything," he said, his quivering nerves bombarding her senses.

"No, I just finished," she said. He seemed as jittery as he'd been earlier.

"Oh good," he said then cleared his throat and mindlessly rubbed his hands together. "I just came from the training room. Well not really. I mean, I showered first. I wasn't gonna come talk to you all sweaty and gross. But I think it would've sounded weird if I said I just showered for you. Not that I did! Like I said, I was working out. Before. Uh… yeah."

She almost laughed at how flustered he was. He was acting like such an idiot she actually found it endearing. She never thought she'd be able to find his foolishness attractive but at the moment she really wanted to make a move. Not that she would. "Okay. So you worked out, took a shower, and then stopped by my room. I'm still waiting to know why."

"Right," he said, almost scolding himself, then cleared his throat. "Um, before I say what I wanted to say, you haven't made any calls since the last time we spoke, have you?"

"I told you, I was meditating," she replied, finding this an odd question. "I don't generally take calls while achieving inner peace."

"So you didn't talk to Wally or anyone of that nature?" he asked, a look of relief slowly washing over him.

That's when she knew what this was about. She felt a twinge of excitement ignite within her and she was very glad she'd just meditated or she would have given herself away. "No, I haven't spoken to anyone."

"Good, good," he smiled anxiously, shifting weight from foot to foot. It was quiet for a beat until he finally exhaled a breath he'd apparently been holding. "So uh… what the hell, you only live once, would you like to be my date to the gala?"

She wanted to laugh. He was averting her eyes, grabbing at his clothes anxiously, and doing his best to fight the urge to fidget; he looked like a fourteen year old. She never thought she could get such a reaction out of anyone other than a fan off the streets or at a meet and greet. But she couldn't help torturing him a bit more for her own amusement. "You're asking me properly this time," she noted. "No assumptions?"

"Nope, I learned my lesson," he said firmly.

"You're not just asking because I'm your last resort, are you?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"No no no! You're my first resort," he said quickly then seemed to go shy again, averting her gaze once more. "You were kinda always my first resort. Well not resort. My first choice." She felt herself blush and her chest seize as she forgot to breathe for a moment. "I've just been a pussy about asking you. You know me. I'm smooth and cool until I actually need to be."

"You? Smooth and cool?" she smirked, doing her best to hide how actually happy she was at that very moment.

"Shut up," he smiled and grabbed his face, bashfully. "So, how about it? Yes or no? Or are you gonna drag this out just to torture me?"

She called upon all of her self-control and restraint to not pounce on him and show him how ecstatic she was feeling. She cleared her throat, a nervous twitch, and said with a small pleased grin, "Thank you for asking me properly. I'd be happy to accompany you."

There was an instantaneous look of relief and delight on his face, coming across in a wide smile and a twinkle in his eyes. "Seriously?"

She rolled her eyes. "Seriously."

"Wow, awesome," he said a bit too happily. He appeared to realize this and immediately changed. He shook off his giddiness, sniffed indifferently, and said, "I mean, yeah, that's great. Phew, glad that's out of the way. Now, be straight with me, are we gonna be the best looking couple there are what?"

Couple? She knew he didn't mean it in that way but it had still caught her off guard. She played her emotions off with a simple sigh and said, "Compared to Kori and Dick?"

"Oh please, they're so old news," he brushed her off. "We're new, we're fresh, we're an out of nowhere pairing! You and me, we're talking front cover material, Rave."

"That doesn't sound like something I'd want to be a part of," she winced uncomfortably.

He laughed in his throat, smiling. "No, that doesn't sound like you. Don't worry, I won't let anyone do anything you don't like. I promise that as your date."

"Okay, good luck with that," she said with a dry chuckle and retreated back into her room. "I'll talk to you later."

"You got it!" he winked and took the cue to leave.

Once he was out of sight she closed the door and calmly made her way over to her bed. She sat down and proceeded to fall back, a wide smile possessing her lips. She was both filled with excitement and relief, something that was quite rare for her, then amazement at the reaction he was able to evoke from her. She blushed and bit her lip as the excitement surged through her veins until she realized how worked up she was getting. She needed to get a grip or soon she wouldn't be able to play it so coy with him. She sat back up and scolded herself for allowing these emotions, these chemicals in her body, to control her actions. She could allow herself to do many things but being overcome by sentiment was not one of them. Love and relationships were indeed possible but only if she approached them with sense, maturity, and control. So she took in a few deep breaths, regained her composure, and decided a cup of chamomile tea would do her some good.

Somehow the halls felt less stuffy than they had these last few weeks. Weeks? Maybe it had been months. Hell, the stuffiness could have been building up over years. Either way she was able to walk the paths throughout the tower now with ease. But as she walked she heard the dull sounds of voices in the distance. She wasn't sure where they were coming from but she wasn't about to go investigate; she wasn't one for eavesdropping. But as she continued on she found the voices becoming clearer and louder. So she was heading towards the conversation whether she liked it or not. She quickened the pace that way she could hear as little as possible, out of respect for whoever it was that was conversing. It sounded like the guys, though she wasn't quite sure which ones just yet. Then the tones began to take proper shape and she could not only decipher who was speaking but what they were actually saying.

"…way too worked up, man. The hard part's done so just relax!" said the voice of Cyborg.

"The hard part's not done! It's only gonna get harder from here," said the voice of Beast Boy. "It took me five days to work up the nerve to ask her to the damn thing. How the hell am I gonna get through actually taking her? I'm gonna look like an idiot the whole night."

"Then she'll think you're acting perfectly normal," said Cyborg.

"Why am I even talking to you? You're never any help!" Beast Boy snapped.

"Alright, man, chill," Cyborg laughed. "She said yes so why're you still so nervous? If she didn't want anything to do with you she would've turned you down flat. But she said she'd go with you and, from what you said, she doesn't seem to be doing it out of pity."

"Yeah but how can I be sure?" asked Beast Boy. "She's way better at covering up what she's feeling than me. She probably _is_ pitying me."

"Oh please, you two have been playing footsies for weeks," said Cyborg. "She's not pitying you. Hell, she's probably as excited as you are."

"I don't think that's possible," Beast Boy said woefully. "I really like her, Vic. Like, it's stupid how much I like her."

"Trust me, I'm aware," said Cyborg. "Look, it's not for five days. So how about you just take the rest of the day off from thinking about it? That gives you another four days to get sick and anxious. Besides, you must be exhausted after gathering up all your courage to ask her in the first place."

"You have no idea," Beast Boy replied. "I think I need a nap."

"I think a nap would do you good, bud," Cyborg advised.

Raven had stopped walking. She wasn't sure when her feet had ceased to move but she was definitely standing still. She couldn't believe the conversation she'd just accidentally heard. She felt dizzy, faint, hot. Every bit of her body tingled terribly and wonderfully. She knew the chemistry between them hadn't been one sided but to actually hear him say that he liked her out loud was a bit of a shock. And she stood there dumbly for a moment too long. Suddenly he had rounded the corner and was in front of her. He just about tripped over his own feet when he saw her. She reacted no better, jumping out of her stunned frozen position in a very obvious way.

"Oh, uh, hi!" he barked, nerves obviously shaken.

"H-Hi," she breathed, feeling embarrassed at being caught. She did her best to regain her composure but did avert her eyes from his. "Sorry, I was just going to make myself some tea."

"I was gonna go take a catnap," he said with a nervous chuckle he tried to play off as a nonchalant chuckle.

"I heard," she replied automatically then snapped her lips shut at her blunder. She tried to think of what to say to retract her statement but the damage was already done.

His eyes were now filled with embarrassment and soul crushing pain. "Oh man," bled from his lips as he grabbed his face, mortified. "You heard all that?!"

"No, not all of it," she blushed, feeling as exposed as he was. "Just… the last bit."

He seemed to shrivel into a brownish/red/green mortified lump. "No, no, no! I can't believe you heard me. What the hell was I thinking talking about this in the hallway? I'm so stupid!"

"Please don't… It's alright… You didn't…" she sputtered, unsure of what to say. What a terribly uncomfortable situation. She could feel the pain all of this was giving him and she desperately wanted to make him feel better. Unlike her, who had known for some time, he had no idea that their feelings were mutual. He didn't know how happy she was to have accidentally heard his confession. So she held her breath, took a step forward, and wrapped her arms around him. He instantly went still and silent, no doubt from the shock of her actions. She could feel his heart thumping in his chest through her own and soon their beats became unified. Then, gently, she said, "I'm glad I heard what you said. Because… I like you, too."

He was very quiet for what felt an age to her. Her entire being felt aflame and she wondered if perhaps she'd made a mistake or had misheard him and that her confession just now wasn't warranted. Then he took in an unsteady breath. "Seriously?"

She held him a little tighter. "It's stupid how much I like you."

Their hearts beat together twice then his arms were around her, holding her just as close but so much tighter than she could have managed. "You better not be messing with me."

She shook her head. "I'm not."

"Oh my God," he said in both shock and relief, desperately holding her to his body.

By all accounts she should have been exceedingly uncomfortable with this level of intimate contact but it was the opposite; she'd never felt more at peace. The tension that had been building between them had finally broken and she felt all but limp with relief and contentment. Let this never end and let no one else ever know. Let this be their love and let no one else experience any part of it. These were the selfish thoughts running through her mind as she became intoxicated by the scent of his freshly washed hair and skin.

"Wait a second." Suddenly he was holding her away from him. "If you like me then why the hell did you turn me down the first time I asked you and say you were gonna see if Wally could take you?"

"You didn't ask me the first time," she replied plainly. "You assumed I'd go with you without question. But I did say yes when you asked me properly."

"Oh," he said, realizing his past mistakes. He then smiled and brought her in close again, "Well I'll try to do things properly from now on."

"'Try' being the key word, I'm sure," she rolled her eyes then softened into his grasp.

"Shut up," he chuckled. "At least it all worked out in the end."

She laughed silently, basking in the feeling of their entangled emotions. And though it was hot and prickly she enjoyed every bit of it. "Yes, I suppose it did."

**The End**

P.S.: Cyborg was totally around the corner listening to the whole thing and then reported the news to Nightwing and Starfire. Merry Christmas!


End file.
